Since I was kid, I used to write a lot. One of my favorite hobbies was writing letters to my mum; either telling her how much I love her and thanking her for everything she did for me, or apologizing in case I have upset her (which was, thankfully, only for once!).
Therefore, writing was one of the ways I used to communicate with mum or anyone else. I always found it easier to express myself in written than verbal; because sometimes, it is hard to find the right words to say in some situations. However, when you write, you have all the time to get the right words to deliver your message to the reader.
But, in the middle of growing up, getting busy with high school, teenage life and then college and work life; unfortunately, writing got forgotten and lost. My favorite way of communicating with the outer world vanished. The only thing I thought I was really good at was gone! Even though throughout all those years, mum kept on encouraging me to get back to writing, but it was hard to get back on track!
And now that I decided to get back to writing, I feel I lost the way..! The path that was leading me to creative writing is no longer straight..! I have gained some kind of fears called fear of writing… Writing is no longer the fun thing to do. Actually it became frightening thing to do. The idea of exposing yourself and ideas to everyone to read started terrifying me!! Knowing that you will be judged and criticized is a scary thing! And having all those negative “what if..?” questions running in my head… “What if nobody reads for me?” “What if I run out of ideas?” “What if somebody tells me my writing is horrible? ….
And to shorten the story, I became a ‘closet writer’!
And, one day… after discussing my fear with one of my dearest friends, she told me this:
“If you didn’t try, you will never know! And if you didn’t practice, you will never learn! And if you didn’t start, you will never fulfill your dream!.. People criticize no matter what, so it is your choice to take the good and leave the bad. So, don’t let the fear stop you and START!”
So, here I am… Taking my friend’s advice and facing my fears… It was kind of a hard decision, but I’m sure it was the right one! And, as Bill Cosby said:
“In order to succeed, your desire for success should be greater than your fear of failure.”
Therefore, in order to succeed, I must defeat my fears and never think of failure. After all, there is no such thing as failure, but only lessons!